The Magic is Gone

 

There is Mud in the Water 

and the Magic is Gone.

Part II of II

I remember the thrill. Hours spent poring over census records, deciphering faded handwriting on old wills, and connecting the dots between generations. Genealogy was an all-consuming passion, a puzzle I was determined to solve. Then, somewhere along the way, the spark faded.

It's a common story in the genealogy community, yet it's rarely talked about. We often hear about breakthrough discoveries and unwavering dedication, but what about when the fire just… dies? If you've found yourself staring blankly at your family tree software, feeling more dread than excitement, you're not alone.

Read Part I

I feel after spending over 20 years of my life chasing ancestors, ghosts, brick walls, stories, and sources, I'm exhausted from having to constantly repeat myself on what and where Appalachia is and who Appalachians are. 

Mud in the Water by Gasoline Gypies.

52 Ancestors Week 9: Family Secret

this week’s theme is “family secret.”   Tips on sharing the deep dark secret and setting it free.

Every family has its stories, the tales passed down through generations, embellished with each retelling. But what happens when a story isn't told? What happens when a secret, carefully guarded and whispered only in hushed tones, finally comes to light?

You already know mine by reading Surprise, DNA Edition, Letters, and bits from the Migration posts.  But, as a professional genealogist, over the years, I have had my fair share of secrets that I've discovered and discussed with clients.  This is never an easy conversation.  In all my years, when I say I have a secret to tell you about.... it's not that you are directly related to a famous cousin but rather your cousin might be closer than a cousin.

The ethnicity estimate, from the Ancestry.com DNA test, was interesting enough, confirming some family lore and debunking others. But it was the "DNA Relatives" section that truly caught my attention. There, listed alongside distant cousins I'd never heard of, was a name that didn't belong. A name with a significantly higher percentage of shared DNA than a distant relative should have. 

To help understand what to do with a surprise in your DNA Test, I've put together a few tips that worked for me.  There are still times that I get angry or sad or incredibly frustrated because one side of the story is not being told but I always remember:  Let the skelton out of the closet to dance.

Click on Read More to read the tips on sharing your family secret....

52 Ancestors Week 8: Migration

 

This week’s theme is “migration.”   The Hillbilly Highway

I am the product of the Hillbilly Highway.  My Dad decided to move my mom and two brothers out of Weston, West Virginia to Baltimore, Maryland for the chance of a better life.  Jobs were scare in West Virginia.  Families were hungry.  Many left Appalachia for the Steel Towns of the North and the opportunities to the East.  This became known as the Hillbilly Highway.

Some made it back home.  Others never did.   

This video is maternal family's deeply personal story. "Hillbilly Highway: The Out-Migration of Appalachians" features Sandy Patak discussing the migration patterns of people from the Appalachian region to industrial cities. The presentation delves into the reasons behind this migration and examines the cultural impacts on both those who left and those who remained in Appalachia. 

What is the Hillbilly Highway and Why is it so important to Appalachian Genealogy?

Click on Read More to find out....

52 Ancestors Week 7: Letters

This week’s theme is “Letters & Diaries.”
When truth is put in one's own handwriting.

If you read the blog post from last week, Surprise, DNA Version, this is a carry over from that discussion.

Letters?  Oh, I have letters!   I have letters in my biological father's handwriting that he wrote me over a span of two years (after he found out that I was his biological daughter - well, after it was confirmed by DNA).

Oddly, I only have one photo of us together.  This photo was the weekend that we met as adults at his home in Buckhannon, West Virginia.

But, let's get back to the letters.  Do you want to read them???

Click on Read More to see the picture....

52 Ancestors Week 6: Surprise

 

This week’s theme is “Surprise.”   The DNA surprise when your family tree takes a sharp turn. 

We've all heard the stories, the slightly awkward jokes about getting a DNA test and discovering your parent is not your parent.  Here's how I found out...

I'd always been curious about my ancestry. I grew up with such dark brown eyes that they were almost black.  My parents had the bluest of blue eyes.  When Ancestry.com started heavily advertising DNA kits for a reasonable price, I instantly bought one and got DNA tested. 

To say that I DNA tested to find out who my parents were is truly only part of the story though.  I was convinced that I was Italian.  From an early age, I was always told that I had so much Italian "about me".  With my Dad's name as Craig and my Mom's Maiden Name as Bonner.... I was not understanding where any Italian would come from.  But that is a blog post for another time....

Note: I would never have done a DNA test if my dad were still alive. It's also important to state that "my dad" is the man who raised me from birth. "My father" is my biological father, as determined by a DNA test.

So, I had a guess who my biological father was.  I actually had it narrowed down to three people with one being in the lead.   Why?  His picture!

Click on Read More to see the picture....

You couldn't pay me to do this year again

 

Four People, Two Pets

My Journey of loss and sharing the songs that got me through 2024. This is not an easy "feel good" read. If triggering, feel free to skim the words and just click on the YT Video links.

I remember sitting at my computer in my office in February 2024. All the lights were out except for the glow of the computer monitor. I was slowly eating cold Lo Mein from a carton with chopsticks. On my monitor was the WikiTree profile of my biological father. It was time to add his date of death. He had died hours earlier, and I found out via a Facebook message. That was the courtesy given to me as his child. My husband nailed it—he told me exactly how this would all play out, and damn if he wasn't 100% spot on.